Skip to main content

You are a smart woman. Now act like one!

We all grew up reading the princess stories where the strong, handsome men aided women in need of rescuing. Their valiant acts involved elaborate ordeals of physical strength and mental sharpness which essentially meant that men dashing in to rescue women from harm was critical to the women’s lives moving forward. And the women? The women were the passive in-distress participants, who, apart from being unable to advocate for their own needs and wants; needed a man to control the fate of their lives and save them from distress.

For years, we have created the message, oft repeated in stories that our children read and imbibe, that women may not be able to advocate their own needs and men have to be able to provide for women and keep them from harm. In effect; we have grown up with a social psychology which leads us to believe that women need someone else to take care of them and save them from misfortune. Boys become men believing that their role is to provide for women and keep them safe from harm.
With conditioning like that; no wonder, as women, we have to work harder to regain control of our lives, restructure and realign our interpersonal equations at home and work and deal with obstacles in the process of being our own person.
As girls, we are taught to be nice, not to ask, and accommodate others to ease their discomfort; not to create conflict, not to be aggressive and not to have a sense of entitlement. As leaders; all these traits minimize self-agency. We are taught not to be strong; yet strong we must be in order to be leaders.
As we prepare and propagate our cause of equal rights the world over; we must change the locus of control to within us; rather than outside of us.
It is perfectly fine to be clear in your expectations from a relationship at home and work. It is perfectly acceptable to ask. It is perfectly reasonable if you are not able to accommodate the perspective of the other at all times. It is perfectly acceptable to feel entitled to respect at home and at work. It is perfectly acceptable to be self- reliant and independent. Know your power. Claim and promote your needs, accomplishments and value. Create a baseline for imbibing leadership.
Women participation in every sphere of home and work, corporate or government; socially and visibly is a prerogative not a privilege.  Be yourself. Act yourself. Break through the barriers that inhibit you. 

Popular posts from this blog

The Clock is Ticking : BACKWARD FOR WOMEN

Sometimes it is just a customary sound; but a movement that takes us backward; instead of steering us forward.

2017 and 2018 have been the most regressive years in the progress of women. 

Since Trump became the President of the United States of America, a new culture of suppression of women rights has unleashed worldwide.  He has slowly degraded Women Rights by attacking fair pay legislation, defunding reproductive rights and changing the definition of violence against women. His attitude towards women is evident from the way he treats women and his objectification of the whole gender. In response, the women rights movement has revived itself, only to become negative and vicious.

No one wins when we have to fight. It is still a pity that we have to wave flags, march, hoist posters and commemorate each other on this day every year. We should not have to. 

The global economy could be enriched by about $160tn (£120tn) if women earned as much as men. 

No Zaghari-Ratcliffe should have to be in …

How should you deal with Bullies ?

It could be someone you know or someone you barely know. Bullying is the act of directing aggressive, intimidating, or threatening behaviors that are directed at an individual with the intent to cause physical or emotional harm.

Bullying can take on a variety of forms and can be in-person or through the use of electronics and technology, called cyberbullying. While this list isn’t exhaustive, you may be a victim of bullying and/or cyberbullying if someone: Subjects you to verbal taunts aimed to embarrass or humiliate youManipulates you into giving up possessions or money for fear of harm or embarrassmentPushes, shoves, kicks, or otherwise physically harms youSends and/or forwards to others any insulting emails, texts, videos, photos, or social media posts that are derogatory or untrueImpersonates you on social media to embarrass you or share your private informationUses electronic messages (texts, Facebook posts, etc.) with angry or threatening languageWhat can you do?
Bullies are weak p…

Avaya is out of its Chapter 11 Bankruptcy . I remember our first Avaya Project

Those were the days! Being one the largest resellers and specialists for Avaya Customer Interaction Centers and then their Distributors was just another story.

I was going over my old archives and came across the first time we won the Project of the Year Award for delivering the most impossible software and hardware integration of a customer interaction center in 90 crazy days and nights in Doha. I don't think the team slept for more than a year. We wouldn't go back home for days and live in fear of downtime ad infinitum, ad nauseum. The cost per minute of downtime was $60,000.

There were no weekends, there were no vacations. All we knew was to deliver this most important opportunity of our lifetime.

When we did get the time; we would get into monopoly warzones in the employee housing to keep sanity or watch pirated dvds of Prison Break and nonstop  Keifer Sutherland's 24.

It was just a never-ending spiral to build a company, to work so hard to beat a market that had never…